13 February 2010

The president of Legaña, Pedro Cuahchic, has been accused of failing to support his valuable ally and Emperor of Legoland, Emperor David. The accusations come after a valuable shipment of rifles offered by El Presidente to help the Legoland government in its war against the Legoban were delayed until after a peace deal had been brokered between the two sides.

The shipment of rifles were accompanied by important road-building materials which were earmarked to aid in the redevelopment of the Legoland capital, in addition to a batch of much-needed steering-wheels to improve driving conditions on the roads of Legoland. The offer came as the fighting in Legoland was at its most severe, with the Legoban in de facto control of several important towns. The conflict left 117 Legoland troops dead, and many in Legaña feel Cuahchic is partially to blame for the losses.

A Legoland official who wished to remain anonymous told us that, "We contacted the Legañan authorities on several occasions to find out when the shipment would be loaded up for departure. Their response was always the same - 'It ships mañana, after our siesta'."

It is said in some circles that the generosity of the aid will have been lost due to the lateness of its arrival. One can only hope that if the current civil-war in Legaña takes a turn for the worse, the Legoland government will send aid much more promptly than their lackadaisical counterparts in Legaña.

Mr Ingel Simpleton, Legañan correspondent

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